When I call my out of state parents we always talk more than an hour, which is lovely. I feel like I owe them a call sometimes though, days will go by and an hour to chat seems to evade me. I am lucky enough to need more than one hour, one for my mother (my stepdad Budsie died last November) and one for my Dad and stepmother, Jean.
My own Facebook post from 2015 was available in my feed today and reminds me how fun and precious the calls can be; worth sharing here, I think:
“This morning I talked to both of my parents and their spouses. I got all the news from Jean including her investigating local real estate deals while at the local pizzeria .....and then my dad got on and he had me in tears of laughter with a story about Comcast service in the home. He presented sort of an outrageous situation, imagine having an outrageous issue with Comcast- but he handled the conversation as if he was Christopher Walken. He was telling me what he said with a Christopher Walken voice and phrasing. My dad is the funniest storyteller! I could not speak I was laughing so hard and then he got to laughing.... Does anything feel better?
Then I made my second call. I shared a fast little joke with Budsie before he put my mom on, and we caught up for 20 mins before I heard they were in a bit of a hurry...they are off to the Boy Scout Sale in Chelmsford at the Congregational Church in the center. They are not going to buy anything though, they do not need anything. They are going for the burgers, not just any burgers, “they are grilling them up right now, they are really yummy and only two dollars.” She takes a breath. “So I've got to go dry my hair, Lucy-Lou," she says.
I thought as I hung up: it is so sweet to sometimes be called Lucy-Lou. It made me remember something my dad says about car shopping, "You could not pay to have this much fun." ( He actually loves car shopping, he is not being sarcastic.)
Do not forget to call your people. Remind me when you see me. I am very lucky to have them all in my life this long into my life. If you are missing yours maybe take a moment and remember one of the silly happy simple moments you had with them. Bless yourself as a memory washes over you. Relive it.
If you are feeling sad about anyone you had that you don't have now, sit with the special memories of them.
We can honor ourselves being full of missing, and then. Then get excited about whoever is in your life right now that you CAN call, love, and laugh with. Because I think everyone finds when they test the theory: Life is filled with love when you try to give it out as much as you can.
I promise I will take my own advice.
Dad the storyteller, Mum that calls me Lucy-Lou sometimes, and me. ❤️ At my brother’s wedding almost 10 years ago.